In my recent travels on Michigan roads in noticed that there seems to be some confusion about how to properly use a stop sign. With this in mind I wanted to post a Public Service Announcement on the etiquette of a stop sign.
First, if you are going to blow through a stop sign to get in front of me because executing a legal stop would force you to wait until I go by, then you sure as shit better go at least one mile per hour faster than I am going and if I have to touch my breaks because you're too important to let me pass before pulling out, be prepared to have a Toyota Corolla bumper sticker for the next few miles.
Second, If I'm first to the stop sign, you don't have the right to ignore the stop sign because that is the only way to get in front of me. If you choose to do so please follow the statement in the first example above or expect the bumper sticker response.
Finally, a stop sign in front of a store is meant for a complete stop, followed by acceleration away from the stop sign. Sitting at the stop sign while your 300 pound wife waddles in for a pack of Marlboro's and a vat of ice cream, is not an option. This also applies to the entire sidewalk portion in front of the store. Being lazy or rich does not give you special privileges at Target. Anointing yourself as more important than the handicap makes you an asshole and when a random cart dents your car out of nowhere, consider that your warning.
This has been a Public Service Announcement, brought to you by the slightly disturbed folks at Furriners.
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